I have to ask the question. Is it right to doubt?

Is Peter right? Did he know what he is about?

The disciples gathered in that upper room.

With feelings of joy, perhaps also, of doom.

Their weakness and failure, fresh in their mind.

Yet they were commissioned to tell all mankind.

Jesus had defeated death, that they now knew.

Gone know, wait he said, but they were so few?

Wait for what I promise, just wait and you will be,

Empowered from heaven, just wait and you will see.

Let us have a prayer meeting, such a good idea.

Just ask God for help, and show him how we care.

Then Peter stood and quoted from the scripture.

It seemed so obvious, and painted a clear picture.

We need somebody to replace Judas, that failed man.

It is twelve we need to be, that is God’s proper plan.

So let us vote , then draw straws, to show us God’s will.

Hooray, God has chosen Mathias, a good man to fill the bill.

Yet I have to ask this question, knowing the Pentecost event.

Knowing Paul was later especially called, and then amazingly sent.

Was Peter right in what he said? Was it God’s perfect way ahead?

Were his good intentions, operating in God’s permissive will instead?

God has called me too, yet to sit still is something I do hate.

So difficult like those early disciples, to just sit here and to wait.

Yet God sees our heart when we gather together to pray.

We search the scriptures to see everything, that they do say.

To come up with a well thought up solution of our own.

So exciting, sure God is with us, like a dog with a bone.

We rush off in a tangent, I am sure God looks down and smiles.

As we go on our own way, He knows of His plan all the whiles.

And then we see his perfect plan come into play.

Just be still and know that I am God, he would say.

It is then we see all effort of ours is often just in vain.

We must do our very best now, should our fervour wane.

Must prove to ourselves and to God, that we are on his side,

Those half-hearted Christians we absolutely, cannot abide.

Lord as I wait to see your work, you know it is you I want to please.

You have promised us “you will do even greater work than these”.

Help me then when to wait and see your plan unfold.

When in obedience to step out in faith, and to be oh so bold.

Forgive me when I have raced ahead of this your perfect will.

I wait your works, I pray, help me, just relax and to be still.

Asaw Miller

It was the end for this nation that had
so much hope?
Why, why did they end up on this
long downhill slope?
Captive to their adversary,
by God no longer protected.
Chosen,destined,a mighty nation,
especially selected.
Now fallen,defeated,failed,dispersed,
and destroyed.
Seems so harsh, what did they do?
We’d do well to avoid.
Ezekiel is shown why his people deserve
this terrible sentence.
Thought hidden from view their
secret detestable offence.
In the inner rooms of the temple of God
he was told.
Shocking wanton acts of wickedness,
there to behold.
How could it be that men know God
and yet do this?
Secret sins denied, too easy,
this challenge to miss.
No nothing is hidden from God
deep within this heart.
He knows my every thought,
every secret,furtive, fart.
This where His very Spirit dwells
I know it would offend.
What hope have I for this wicked,
wicked heart to mend?
But somehow he sees a remnant
of goodness there.
Troubled, disappointed,grieving,
He knows I do care.
Like Psamist now my inmost being,
does sing in praise.
Forgiveness, healing, restoration,
for my child He says.
He does not treat as we,
should expect.
This wickedness has no impact,
or real effect,
As a Father has compassion,
Iv’e come to know,
my God’s absolute forgiveness
he will bestow.
He knows my every failing,
right from the start.
Yet His great love stops us,
from being apart.
Amazing it is He would bless,
it would seem.
Those who truly seek Him,
will know what I mean.
My heart is changing from thinking,
any bad thing.
As it is filled with praise,
and to God it does sing.
Asaw Miller

Amazing vineyard that has been left in our care.

Are we releasing to the owner, his rightful fair share?

Too easy, just too easy, to look elsewhere.

Is this a picture of who you are, do you fear.

The vineyard our world I am sure what is meant.

We farmers are charged with being a good tenant.

Comes a time when there will be a nice big harvest.

The landlord will come asking to give him our best.

From my life there will be such blessing seen and to be had.

Not sharing my harvest with the landlord, am I just as bad?

Doing so well, such success and acclaim.

Riches and honour and glory to my name!

The landlord comes asking, where is his share?

It’s mine, mine, my work, my very good care.

Too easy to justify all the effort and hard work.

My hand to the plow, the tasks, I never did shirk.

I deserve this harvest. It is only my fair reward.

The other tenants agree. We are all of one accord.

Then he sends again, saying, I only ask what is mine.

I give just a little hoping, that all will be fine.

Much more is due, next he sends his own son.

Surely we must give from the harvest He won.

My heart full of greed and selfishness, I must confess.

Same as those old Pharisees, probably give even less.

But now I’m realizing what my responsibility is.

So blessed in the role of tenant, in this garden of His.

Now I have determined to give Him His due share.

Perhaps He will give me more vineyard to care.

That a great harvest will come in that, I won’t want to hoard.

That I will be seen as a good tenant,  by my amazing landlord.

Asaw Miller

I had followed Jesus,

these last few years.

Committed, I had put aside,

all other cares.

He was all I hoped for.

For all that I had seen,

Had transformed me from,

the person I had been.

Simon a fisherman from,

a small town in Galilee.

He said I call you Peter,

a solid man is who I do see.

I have determined to follow him,

whatever may come.

I will defend, although there’s,

opposition by some.

In Jesus I have a new found knowledge,

and faith in this day.

I will never let Him down.

Nothing will stand in my way.

Then he said you will all scatter,

when you see me in big strife.

I said no way! I will follow you.

Even defend you with my life.

What happened next, I could not,

accept or understand?

He would not let me defend.

Though totally underhand.

The popular support, my mates,

Jesus,  no longer here.

My whole world shattered,  lost.

I gave into foolish fear.

I bitterly wept. I had let Him down.

Jesus gave a sorrowful look.

I left, my promise came to nothing.

For Him I had now forsook.

More than that, for He was God.

Jesus rose from the dead!

I had walked with Him in this life,

on earth that He had led.

Again He met with us disciples.

Revealing he is just the same.

Not a word did He say, I a downcast feeling,

of utter…..utter shame.

Called Peter, dependable, reliable, brave,

a leader, the man.

Really Simon, just a Galilean fisherman.

My promise just a sham.

Still loyal, I realize , I should do what,

I really do know best.

From all this turmoil, and trouble,

I just need a total rest.

Then one morning, He came again.

He stood on my lake shore.

As though nothing had changed?

Just like it was before.

Then he asked, Simon do you really,

love me more than these?

Yes Lord, you know I do. I will do,

anything, anything to please.

Feed my lambs, but then He asked,

again He  asked, twice more.

Do you really love me, Simon?

You need to be absolutely sure.

I do. How good it felt to tell him this.

That He did, really want me now.

I could start again. My failure had somehow,

lost all it’s shattering power.

Feed my sheep, He said.

It felt like a big responsibility.

It told me He accepted me.

My weakness and all my frailty.

No longer just Simon, but Peter.

I felt I was a new man.

Accepted by God, He will lead me,

in this His biggest plan.

Made me feel oh so good.

Now wanted, with my chequered past.

Forgiven, restored, my strength in Jesus.

A future in God, that will be seen to last.

The Rock

Asaw Miller

I was successful and so rich.

Although some would claim.

A cheat, disloyal, should be filled,

with guilt and shame.

I always loved accounts,

and playing with the figures.

Became a tax collector,

despite ongoing little sniggers..

Caught in a life of riches,

yet feeling oh so poor.

No way out . This my life forever.

Rotten to the core.

I had heard amazing things,

Jesus was coming my very way.

Just maybe he could change my life,

so I could feel…. a little bit okay.

A good teacher like him,

Could hardly accept a man like me.

Decided from a distance,

I would watch him from this tree.

Then he came past and looked,

Way up there so high.

Come down he said , I will eat with you.

I had to wonder why?

Would this man accept me?

I knew I was absolutely bad.

But now I want to change my life.

Raised hopes and heart so glad.

This confounded some, and went against,

all they did believe.

That God would love a guy like me,

is hard for others to conceive.

I said this day if I have cheated anyone,

I will pay back him fourfold.

I will give half my riches to the poor.

This has made me oh so bold.

A new man,  changed, leaving all behind,

I decided there and then.

If I can be accepted and forgiven,

I will go and tell all other men.

My security in Him alone,

Never again to feel , so empty and so hollow.

No longer looking for my own desire,

It is Jesus I want to Know and follow.

Asaw Miller

My friends had watched me,  in all my strife.

A sorry cripple was I.  My bitter lot in life.

My friends defended,  so earnestly concerned.

Others told a troubled life like mine,  is always earned.

I deep down felt it could be true.  It was my fault.

So sad my feelings of failure,  I just could not halt.

My friends determined to help,  and see me right.

Take me to this famous healer,  to win the fight.

Through the roof lowered,  to help me in my plight.

Looking down hopefully,  a sorry pathetic sight.

I lay there, my weakness,  totally displayed.

Surrounded by success.  Me a failure, and afraid.

My inability to walk not really,  all my worry.

I deserve this, get me out of here,  Jesus I’m so sorry.

Then He said something,  I will never forget.

It made the watching experts,  totally upset.

It’s not your fault that,  you cannot walk.

Your faults do not count,  forget all that talk.

How good it felt,  not guilty was His verdict.

Although I knew I had been,  far from perfect.

Happy cripple now I was,  but then He said,

As if to prove a point,  get up pick up your bed!

Amazing how good it felt,  now no guilt in me.

Stand He said, legs healed,  for the cynics now to see.

I looked those expert detractors,   in the eye.

They just saw a problem.  Jesus gave a sigh.

How sad it was,   they would not celebrate.

Unconcerned for me,  just wanted a debate.

It was an offence.  Forgiveness God’s alone to name.

But forgiven, healed,  I would never be the same.

Freedom

by Asaw Miller